Six things to do if you are thinking about divorce

Divorce is a difficult subject, but it is also common in today’s society where almost 50% of marriages fail.  I’ve handled family law cases in Lake County, Indiana and these are some ideas that I find are valuable for clients.

The information in the post is geared to Lake County, Indiana courts, but it can be useful for people in other Indiana counties as the trend within the legal community is to move away from aggressive and conflict-oriented divorce cases and to a cooperative parenting model.

1.  Think of your children first

Children are the top priority in Lake County, Indiana’s local rules of family law.

“In all family cases with children, the goal will be protecting the best interests of those children,” states local family law rule 2.

You should place your children above all other priorities.  Divorce is rough for the parents.  Just think about how tough it is for your kids.  Spend extra time with them.  Keep their life normal — as normal as you can during a divorce.  Reassure them everything will be okay.  Tell your children that you love them.

Do not use your children as counselors.  Also, do not enlist your children to spy on the other spouse. Lake County provides excellent resources for parents involved in family law matters that can be of great assistance during these times.

2.  Set up an appointment with an attorney right away

It’s never fun to have to hire a lawyer.  But, you’ll want to meet with one right away so that you can discuss how to act in the best interests of your children as well as safeguard your interests.

Hiring a lawyer can actually help reduce some of the stress involved in a divorce by guiding you through the process, handling negotiations with the other attorney, and providing valuable counsel.

3.  Make copies of household bills, other important paperwork, including pay stubs and make a list of household property

Lake County’s local rules require mandatory disclosure of financial information, so copying your financial records will save time and effort when it’s time to exchange financial documents.  It also lets you and your lawyer see fully your family’s financial condition.

Make sure to copy your spouse’ pay stub, if you can.  It will be helpful in determining child support, if children are involved.  Make a list of any valuable or collectible items, since Lake County’s local family law rules require disclosure of these items.  Having a list can prove beneficial if any of the valuable items cannot be located later during the divorce.

4.  Review your budget and expenses

The court might make decisions about who pays what bills at certain points in the case.  Knowing your family’s budget will help the court make decisions regarding family finances.  Divorce is difficult on family finances.  Knowing your financial condition is valuable in making plans for the future.

5.  Do financial planning for the future

Save up some money so that you can pay for a lawyer and possibly court costs.  Also, you’ll want to make sure that you can pay for rent or a mortgage during and after the divorce.  Make plans for paying all of the necessities, such as utilities and groceries.  You’ll want to make sure that you have a budget that meets your needs without the income your spouse might have brought into the household before the divorce.

6.  Seek out family counseling, if needed

Divorce is a painful, difficult and stressful time.

Sometimes it is a good thing to have someone who can discuss how to solve personal issues and provide guidance during the divorce.  While your lawyer can provide valuable legal assistance during this time, it is also helpful to have someone on your side who is trained in the psychological aspects.  This is where a counsel can be extremely valuable for you and your children.

Please see my disclaimer in the sidebar to the left.

If you need help with a family law issue in Lake County, Indiana, feel free to contact me by email to set up an appointment at CHedges (at) nwindianalaw.com.

Christopher C. Hedges has been licensed as a lawyer in Indiana since 1996 and Illinois since 2005.

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