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The presidential campaign is going to be heating up as we get closer to the general election.  The presidential aspirants have already been gearing up for the election by moving away from the fringes so that they can attract more people in the center.

A part of the presidential “strategery” is to make all sorts of promises to the voters.

Here are a few examples: Voters in Ohio get all of the buckeyes they ever want.  People in Florida will get government sponsored shuffleboard games and free rides to bingo parlors.  Everyone in California gets a free soy latte on the taxpayers’ dime.  Everyone in the gun-totin’ and Bible thumping states get a free gun, NRA membership and Bible in the translation of their choice. 

Things like that always seem to get people all excited that the man or woman in the White House will make an impact on their lives by giving out all sorts of “free” things.

While the candidates are in the mood to give things away, here’s my wish list.  It brings me back to the days when Sears printed up their Christmas wish book before the days of the internet so that kids could circle all of the things they wanted their parents to buy for them.

My November 2008 wish list:

1)  A Million Dollars.  I know many taxpayers are getting economic stimulus checks from the government this year ranging from $300 to $1800.  That’s a good start.  Why not up the amount to really stimulate the American population?  I’d contribute more to the economy if I had a million dollars in the bank.

2) Free Gas.  Everyone is complaining about gasoline and energy prices.  The government needs to do something about it.  Why not give away the gasoline and other fuels for free?  Isn’t the right to happiness an important goal?  I’d be very happy if the government gave me free gasoline.  After all, if it is good enough for our local leaders — aren’t they always driving around in county cars and getting free fillups at the county pumps — it should be good enough for their employers — the American public.

3) Pay Off My Student Loans.  Want my vote?  You’re going to have to earn it.  After you give me the Million Dollars and Free Gasoline, I’m going to need to have the government pay off my student loans.  After all, we’ve all heard the stories about how the bar keeps moving and people keep grabbing for it and it just gets moved a little higher out of the way.  Who do you think is controlling that moving bar?  The student loan people — in my case the U.S. Department of Education.  Pay off my student loans and I’ll happily vote for you.

4.  Government Pay For Blogging.  The government set up the WPA back in the 1930s to get people back to work.  They paid photographers and artists to do the things that they loved to do.  Everyone is talking about how we’re in for hard economic times these days.  Why not subsidize blogging in a heroic effort to get the country going in the right direction and to make a radical change from the past? The government pay will have to be a living salary so that we bloggers won’t have to worry about the necessities.  I think the blogger vote would be guaranteed at at government pay rate comparable to that given to a government employee at the GS 15, Step 10 level ($124,010 in 2008).  Also, to save on green house gasses and road congestion, I’ll do all of my work from home or a nearby coffee shop with wi-fi access.  As part of my job’s fringe benefits, the government will need to provide me with a wireless access card so that I can continue to do my work if I am away from an internet connection or wi-fi hotspot. 

5.  Free Housing.  Housing is a fundamental right and therefore it must be provided for free by the government.  I’m not going to be greedy and demand that the government move me into the Trump Tower along the Chicago River.  They can just pay off my mortgage.  It’s the least the government could do to buy — I mean sway — me.

This is my humble wish list from a voter who is looking for five or so reasons to vote for a particular candidate.

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